Losowe angielskie dowcipy
Even in Disguise ->
A blonde walks into an electronics store and points to something behind the clerk. "How much is that television set?" she asks. "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," the clerk said. So, the girl walks out. The next day, she returns wearing a brow... [ca造 ->]
Reasoning Test ->
Three elderly ladies were at the doctor for a cognitive reasoning test. The doctor says to the first gal, "What is three times three?" "297," was her prompt reply. "Ummm humm," says the doc. The doctor says to the second lady, "It's your turn... [ca造 ->]
Some useful bits of info! ->
Bits of information to help you through the day: If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (In my next life I want to be a pig!) ... [ca造 ->]
Dumb,eh? ->
A man came home a day early from a business trip and discovered his wife in the midst of passionate lovemaking with a total stranger in their bedroom. He demandingly asked, "What on earth are you doing?!?!!" The wife turned to the other man and re... [ca造 ->]
Aussie Trouser Snake ->
An Australian Combat Field Engineer Sergeant and a U.S Marine were on exchange duty and were sharing the latrines. The Aussie Sergeant finished first and walked out without washing his hands. The U.S Marine watched in disgust, finished his squirt,... [ca造 ->]
Life According To TV Land ->
What the world is like in TV land: 1. If a woman is running away from someone she will trip and fall. 2. Your car will always start immediately unless you are being chased by a maniacal killer or a monster of genetic creation. 3. Crazed mani... [ca造 ->]
yo momma ->
Yo momma so damn heavy that when she stands on the scales to get weighed it says "TO BE CONTINUED!"... [ca造 ->]
Why women talk more than men ->
Why do women talk more than men, and why are men smarter than women? Because women have four lips and men have two heads!... [ca造 ->]
Short Lawyer Jokes V ->
Q: What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? A: When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff. Q: What is the definition of a "crying shame"? A: There was an empty seat. Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawy... [ca造 ->]
Penile Operation ->
A guy who has a stuttering problem goes in to his doctor and says "Ex-ex-ex-cu-cu-se m-m-me d-d-oc but I I I have th-th-this st-st-stuttering problem and I I I was wo-wondering if you c-c-c-could help m-m-m-me." "Well take off your clothes and get... [ca造 ->]
Wedding Tragedy ->
What is a wedding tragedy? To marry a man for love, and then find out he has no money!... [ca造 ->]
Judges Award ->
"Mr. Smith, I have reviewed this case very carefully," the divorce court judge said, "and I've decided to give your wife $275 a week." "That's very fair, your honor," the husband said. "And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myse... [ca造 ->]
The big test! ->
An older couple had a son, who was still living with them. The parents were a little worried, as the son was still unable to decide about his future career, so they decided to do a small test. They took a ten-dollar bill, a bible, and a bottle of ... [ca造 ->]
Shoulder Pads ->
Q: Why do blondes wear shoulder pads? A: (With a rocking of the head from side to side) I dunno! Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put spikes in their shoulder pads. Q: How do blondes pierce their ears? A: They put tacks in their shoulder pads... [ca造 ->]
First Body Part to Heaven ->
The story takes place in a Christian school. The teacher asks the question, "What part of your body gets to heaven first?" Three students raise their hand, Jenny, Jim, and little Johnny in the back. The teacher thinks to herself, "I dont want to c... [ca造 ->]